I'm not heartless, just using my heart less

A self-preservation mechanism, a shield to protect myself

From the pain, the hurt, the disappointment, the grief

A coping strategy, a way to survive the turmoil that life can bring

I've been hurt before, wounded by words, actions, and silence

Left to pick up the pieces of a shattered heart, to mend the tears

I've tried to love without caution, to give without expectation

But the risk of hurt, of rejection, of abandonment, has left me hesitant

I'm not heartless, I'm just guarded, cautious, and wise

I've learned to shield myself, to protect my heart from the pain

I've built walls around me, walls that keep people at bay

Walls that prevent them from getting too close, from seeing the real me

But sometimes, in the quiet moments, when the world is still

I feel the weight of those walls, the burden of carrying this shield

I long to be free, to be me, without the armor, without the disguise

To love without fear, to give without expectation, to be vulnerable and open

I'm not heartless, I'm just scared, scared of being hurt again

Scared of loving and losing, of giving and not receiving

Scared of being left behind, of being forgotten, of being ignored

Scared of the uncertainty, the unpredictability of life

But even with all these fears, I know I'm not alone

I know there are others out there, others who feel the same

Others who are searching for connection, for love, for acceptance

Others who are trying to navigate the complexities of the human heart

I'm not heartless, I'm just human, a complex mix of emotions

A heart that beats with love, with kindness, with compassion

A heart that's been hurt, that's been broken, that's been shattered

But a heart that's still beating, still loving, still hoping

So I'll keep using my heart, but with caution, with care

I'll keep loving, but with boundaries, with self-awareness

I'll keep being me, but with a shield, with armor

I'll keep being human, with all the complexities, with all the emotions.