“…the soul doesn’t know a thing about deadlines.”

I’ve always been late. Not late as in tardy, but late as in taking longer to graduate, starting my career, and finding my passion. While everyone around me seemed to hit their milestones right on time, my journey followed a different, slower rhythm. It’s kind of a funny story, but it’s a pattern I noticed. I used to wonder why my path was always different; when I applied to law school, I was the last one to submit my application. It was so insignificant then, but looking back at major milestones, it makes sense.

A lot of my adult experiences didn’t happen until my mid-20s. I didn't get a real job until I was 26. I attended law school in 2020 but only got called to the Nigerian Bar in 2023. Late.

For a while, I thought I was cursed because really, why always me? I wanted to be on the same level as my friends; I wanted to have a great job, own a house, and go on trips like they did. But no matter how much I tried, it was always different. I applied for roles I was overqualified for and only received rejections. I had writer’s block and couldn’t write a solid body of work. I was sad for the longest time and couldn’t seem to change anything.

Then in 2023, I had a paradigm shift. A spiritual reawakening, you can say. I made the bold decision to just “allow”; to let things happen as they wanted. I learned patience. This was a very scary step to take as someone who is always in control and the best at keeping it all together. I decided to let it all burn, to let it go to shit and see what would happen. Guess what? Nothing negative actually happened.

I passed an exam I’d been struggling with for two years straight. Everyone who knows me knows this story. I found kindred spirits with whom I now share beautiful memories. Love found me, again; deliberately and tenderly. I took two courses and got certified as a career analyst and a marketing associate. Nothing. bad. happened. when I finally allowed myself to breathe.

This isn’t to say I did not have terrible, difficult moments; I had my fair share, especially this year. I started a job in April; the highest-paying role I’ve ever had, and I lost it in three weeks. I became very depressed and didn’t leave my couch for weeks. Thankfully, I have a community in my corner that held me when my legs wouldn’t carry. They supported me every single day: sent me job applications, dragged me outside for air, sent me money for Häagen-Dazs (Naanmet, you’re my hero), sent me music, and just held me in love. I am here because of them, without a doubt.

When I started to recover from that episode, I managed to finish one of the courses I was taking. I passed with an impressive score and got my certification. Back to the job market we go. I sent an average of 10 applications a day from June 2nd till July 2nd. This time I was lucky; it was different. I got invited to four different interviews in the same week. It was unbelievable. Same me? I had the luxury of choosing which ones I’d attend and settled on two roles that aligned with my career goals. By the weekend, I’d been offered a role. It seemed too good to be true and I started to panic; what if I get fired by the third week like the other job? What if I can’t keep up? My anxiety was at an all-time high and I wasn’t sleeping. I didn’t even sign the offer letter until after the third week, just to make sure it wasn’t a sick joke.

I finally had a job I liked.

Starting my career significantly later than most people I know has been interesting. There are so many things I don’t know yet, but I’m excited to learn. I took time to figure out what I truly wanted to do with my life and while it was daunting, it was necessary. I learned the value of pursuing passion over conformity, and when I finally found my rhythm, it was with a clarity that might not have been possible if I had followed a conventional timeline. 

A Chinese Proverb says, “Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still.”

After years of trial-and-error jobs that just didn’t fit and of dreams that didn’t pan out, I am finally in a space where I can feel a sense of fulfillment and purpose that made every detour worthwhile.

To my friends, my lovers; your unfettered support has been my anchor in the storm. You've seen me through my darkest hours and celebrated my smallest victories. You believed in me even when I couldn't believe in myself and that has been the gentle push I needed to keep going. I am so lucky to have you. A love that never falters or wanes. Daalu.

Year 27 has given me a chance to reflect on what it means to be a late bloomer. I’ve learned that the timing of our achievements matters less than the depth of our engagement with them. I’ve discovered that being late doesn’t always mean being behind. It means growing at my own pace, learning unique lessons, and embracing the beauty of a non-linear path. Every step taken in its own time contributes to a richer, more textured existence.

It’s my 27th birthday today. I still live at home with my parents, I have N0 in my account (thank you, Mr. President), and I don’t know what tomorrow holds for me. But I am grateful for the journey that has been uniquely mine; to be able to share myself like this, unashamedly.

This is what growth looks like, y’all. Slow, but perfectly timed.

“…it’s an advantage to be a late bloomer. Because when good things start happening, you’re ready for it.”

Happy birthday to me.