Desperation holds me here

My burning desire to disappear

Is the only reason I can't hear

All the positive talk that seems to be going round

It is something I can fix

If I could stop myself from checking my mails every 2 minutes

I could ease my mind off my own critics

I can hear my heart beating

My palms are sweating

I could feel my hands shaking

It's like I'm never gaining

I'm losing

from every angle

It's hard to tell if there's an end to this

Suffering everywhere, even to take a piss

But each day a lot of things become clearer

I'm not desperate

I just know I deserve better